来自：查字典高考网 2014-12-25
Original
During 1955 to 1975, the mortgage interest rate gradually increase from 5% to 8% and then followed by a dramatic increase from 1975 to 1985 to a peak of 20%. After that, it drops sharply from 1985 to 1995 to a bottom of 8% and then it growth up to 10% in 1995. However, it drops again from 1995 to 1998.
Edit
During 1955 to 1975, the average mortgage interest rate gradually from 5% to 8% and then followed by a dramatic increase from 1975 to 1985 to a peak of 20%. After that, it drops dropped sharply from between 1985 to and 1995 to a of at 8% and then after which it growth up rose to 10% in 1995 . However, it drops again from
Final
During 1955 to 1975, the average mortgage interest rate gradually increased from 5% to 8% followed by a dramatic increase from 1975 to 1985 to a peak of 20%. After that, it dropped sharply between 1985 and 1995 reaching the bottom at 8% after which it rose to 10% in 1996. However, it dropped again from 1995 (10%) to 1998 (9%).
Comments:
Remember to use the past when talking about actions that are finished in the past. I altered some parts not because they were wrong , but because it is better to use a little variety in your descriptions. It is good that you mentioned the peak and bottom, and that you described the trends without worrying about every little change.
Note that the graph shows the AVERAGE mortgage interest rate.
【雅思考试写作评改一例】相关文章：
★ 雅思写作实战篇范文之spending time on TV
★ 雅思写作词汇要求
★ 雅思写作修改一例
★ 雅思写作测验要点
[标签：海外留学,语言考试,雅思]
衍声高考琴行2019高本硕学生暑假音乐会 张俊瀚《陕北民歌主题变奏曲》《阿根廷舞曲》第三乐章
爆笑班主任 第一季 第221集 高考结束学生有多疯狂？山东王老师疯狂吐槽
你高考成绩高吗？这道题目怎能成立？高难度奥数，能不能把你难住
他高考作文仅得6分，总分428分，被985高校录取，却被导师拒绝！
探秘历史 第二季 第211集 此人高考数学考了0分，因作文写3句话被重点大学录取
视频|2019全国高考今日开考: 语文特级教师评析上海卷高考作文
NBA流言收割机 第6集 神预测？高考数学试题暗示猛龙勇士4
优秀！英语数学双满分，广西“最牛”高考状元730分刷新最高纪录
加油吧考生：2019高考咨询大直播 第43集 科学填报志愿 规划精彩人生
1000张学生用草稿纸考研专用免邮空白便宜薄演草演算纸白纸本书写纸批发打草a4大张实惠装18k高考数学草稿本
